Wednesday, May 23, 2007

Break Dancing Epidemic

Recently we have seen a rash of break dancing related beatings. No one knows for sure the motives behind these sinister acts but we can only assume the worst. The attacks seem to be initiated by persons of the troll persuasion and are centered on the gnomes as recipients. We dug deeper into this underworld of mass serving to get the story first hand.

Being Human, my presence was first met with hostility as I came across a group of young trolls practicing this craft behind a local tavern. With staff and bow drawn, I could do little but plea my indifference. The language barrier was a big hurdle, however, our own Olaf Tightpants was there to translate. I had a chance to sit down with one of the dancers.

[Dave]: So, how long have you been break dancing?

[Dancer]: 'Bout as long as me can remember mon.

[Dave]: When did you first realize you could use this skill as a form of attack?

[Dancer]: Let's get one thing straight. I ain't be using it to attack. These 'lil gnomes be try'n to step, 't ain't me fault if dey can't handle get'n dem asses served.

[Dave]: Interesting.

I tried to get in touch with one of the attack victims, however, he declined an interview. Although, he did leave a statement, "These trolls think they're so cool. Long legs, bad attitudes. Psh! Who needs'em. It's not my fault I was born with these stubby legs."

How long will this feud of rhythm and motion continue? How will it affect the youth of this great world? No one can know for sure.

For our less sensitive viewers, we've included video footage of this brutal practice on tape. Viewer discretion is advised.
Breakdancing baby kicking awe
some baby kicking break dance baby flip kick

This is Dave Davidson Signing out.

Only the strong will level!
World of Newscraft

*all images courtesy of Blizzard Entertainment and World of Warcraft
Breakdancing baby kicking awesome baby kicking break dance baby flip kick

1 comment:

Blaine said...

OH MAN! I love that vid! I think I just shat myself laughing!!

World of Newscraft