Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Tier 6 Preview with Olaf Tightpants

Welcome my little Fashionistas. This is Olaf Tightpants, your favorite Fashion Guru. I'm going to give a brief run down of the new armor sets then let you watch a video sample brought to you by the ever so vivacious Fanatik. So get your old rusty 4 and 5 armor and hold on to your helms. Here we go!

Paladin: This little light of mine, I'm gunna let it shine all over the bloodied faces of the unholy, then it'll burn through the flesh of the damned like much hotness! You shimmer and shine in your glowing gear and beautiful Halo!

Rouge: You've got your spiky little collar popped and you don't care who knows it. It's just too bad no one will get to see your demonic trend setting before you burst from the shadow, sneak up behind and stab their backs before they can say, "Sweet sexy Slayer gear!"

Druid: What did I say last time? Re-roll. Sure, you may no look like a tree, or an elk this time. But you know what? You look like an eagle made love to a totem pole and gave birth on you!

Hunter: Jeepers Creepers, where'd you get those peepers? Wait, maybe I don't want to know. Be sure to pack some extra eyedrops, cause when you're creep'n in the brush, you're bound to get a leaf or two in one of your 3 extra eyes.

Warlocks: You sure know how to strut your stuff. Not much to say except "Fly fly little birdie, fly fly." And oh yeah, gnomes, you still look super cute, try'n to be all demonic.

Warrior: A porcupine robo-saurus. It's a complete disaster.

Mage: Buzz Buzz. Your new outfits are rather. . . Shocking? Yeah, I had to say it. It's like a walking lightning rod. Wait? Since when are you able to use shock spells? It's that whole thing a Shaman deal? Tsk Tsk, Bad form.

Shaman: We discussed this Nature thing... didn't we? Well, looks like you got it right, minus the hankie. You have these giant, glowing, menacing shoulders that make you look tres tough, and ruin it with a tissue to cover your face. Soo close!

Priest: Look what we got here. . .Looks like Preists are starting to grow a set of testes. How unfortunate that this wicked armor STILL looks better on the female of the species. At least those beloved shadow spells of yours will finally fit the look. Enjoy. . .For now.

This round, Best in show goes to . . . . Dundundundundundundun ( it's a drum roll. )

WARLOCK! SHA-BAZ! Who'd a thunk it.

This has been Olaf Tightpants, your favorite Fashion Guru.

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*all images courtesy of Blizzard Entertainment and World of Warcraft

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

ZOMG! That was HI-larious! Keep up on the awesome reporting!

Anonymous said...

FU DRUIDS R AWESUM LOOKING

Anonymous said...

ROTFL! lmao! Dang, I want to be a Fashionista. Nice review sugar, but WTF's wrong wit Druids? :( It's not nice to tell them to re-roll. Still funny though!



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